On Looking Young

Whoever said that women will always like it when you guess their age younger than their real age is! I for one do not enjoy being asked conversation like this;

“Have you graduated?”

“Yes.”

“Oh, really, what college are you going to go to?”

“I graduated from college, too.”

or,

“When you grow up you can become a tour guide like me,”

or,

“You have to be older than 20 years old to make a contract with us.”

“I am.”

“I mean, we need to see the I.D. card and everything.”

It just gets frustrating when I hear it almost every time I meet someone. My friends said I just need to put on some makeup and I would look older. What if I do not want to put stuff on my face? What if neither I want to be asked again what grade in high school I was in?

First Page

DailyNews

Today’s first page featuring:

- Princess’ letter to the King

- Train drivers on strike

- Miss Thailand World in swimming suit

- Soldiers in front of the Parliament

- Pub illegally open till morning

- Flood around Chao Praya

- Buddha statue made of coins

- Criminal sentenced death

- Lottery numbers of the month

- etc.

If you read everything they write, you will be taken on a dramatically emotional roller coaster. Everything is so black and white and they will use all the words, sometimes objective, but more often not, they could think of to convince so the world is so. My heart really feels shaken after reading it. It is way too much emotions to start off the day with. I don’t know how others can manage to read the papers everyday.

Can you?

Dickinson and the Crew

You know what I miss? I miss spending days, weeks and sometimes months thinking about someone, someone who supposedly only existed on papers, yet someone who I felt deeply connected to. It didn’t matter that I couldn’t have just called them up and talked to them about life. Just simply reading their thougths, their life stories was enough to confirm it to me that at some point, someone, and somewhere in this world is experiencing the same things I am.

I am not alone. Together we travel, invisibly.

Rock Climbing

I went rock climbing with a friend today. It was my very first time. I was reminded again how it felt to start something anew. There were moments of excitement, suffering, fear, frustration, nervousness and enjoyment. It was most helpful that my hips were flexible from yoga. I was able to stay close to the wall and put weight on my feet. After an hour or so of first time climbing, I was inspired to gain more strength for my fingers, hands and arms.

While I was up there, I realized the importance of cutting nails. Teachers told me it was for appearance, they never mention rock climbing, or else I could be happily cutting my nails as short as I can.

When Bliss Is Gone

I read Mom’s text while I was in a workshop among twenty-something people,

“Ananda is gone.”

I felt an urge to escape. I needed a private time and space to honor Ananda, to honor the relationship between me and him. He was the one inviting me out to breathe in fresh air each morning. I got to hear so many bird songs that I would not have heard, at least at that time of my life, otherwise. He was the one sitting me, Mom and Grandma together to talk. We talked to each other through him. We expressed our love and care through him.

Ananda,

Because of you, love was visible. I will see you in Chao Praya sometime.

love,

Jib

Mom drew Ananda, letting him know we loved him

Back on “the Schedule”

So I am temporarily back on the schedule at Planet Yoga for a week. This time, the name “Jib” is on the schedule. Many students were very surprised to see me walk in class. A repeated comment that really blew my mind was,

“I thought it would be a male Indian when I saw the name Jib.”

How can it be? Jib is a typical name for a Thai girl, as typical as it gets.  I’ve met some male Jibs but most have been female, and all has been Thai.

I was wondering why is it that people making the comment (I’d heard it said four times) was not affected by their experience in life meeting Jibs. I came up with an unproven theory that they stick to a more recent past. There was a yoga teacher named Jai. People expected to meet a female Thai yoga teacher, but had to be surprised to see a male Indian instead. My guess is that the experience had carved it for some studio members to be thinking Jib must be like Jai. Three letter, starting with a J.

Makes sense.

Proper Attire, Please

One morning, I was on my way to a yoga class one passing through the Ministry of Public Health nearby my mom’s house (how proper!). It was seven in the morning. It was unfortunate (only for that particular incident) that my body religiously should be in the toilet at that time. So I stopped by to look for a restroom.

Six years in my Matthayom school (Thai junior high and high school) and four years in university, I had been familiar with a big sign in front of buildings saying,

“ONLY PROPER ATTIRE ALLOWED

IN GOVERNMENTAL BUILDING”

It was cognitive that I suddenly became aware that I was wearing a mini skirt. I have never been the one who feels comfortable breaking rules. But THIS is emergency, I thought. They HAD to understand. Where else was I suppose to go? I wouldn’t make it outside of this enormous governmental villa. I was relieved to find that the only ‘authoritative’ person I had to face before the restroom was a janitor who was too busy to care what I was wearing.  Mission accomplished.

To think of it, how ridiculous it is for one to worry about how short their skirt is in order to answer the need of necessity. Like those signs I saw in restaurants in America:

“NO SHIRT, NO SERVICE”

“SHIRTS AND SHOES REQUIRED”

Yea, who would ever dare fathom eating with their bare feet.

Today’s Practice

downward facing what?!?

Dancing Queen… Young and sweet only seventeeeen

Social Rank Exercise

 

 

Thai people are all about social rank. You should know where you belong to exactly. We can be ‘class’ified by many different things; our age, sex, seniority at work, work position and income and the list goes on. I’m sure you too have some ideas. So today let’s do a practice exercise together. 

 

Situation: A group of strangers connected strictly by work is at dinner table. Who should be serving rice? 

 

1. A female thirty-something salesperson monthly income of 20,000 baht

2. A female twenty-something travel consultant salary of 16,000 baht

3. A female forty-something resort manager salary of 100,000 baht

 

 

 

 

You’ve got your answer in mind?

 

 

 

 

and the answer is 3, yes, a forty-something resort manager salary of 100,000 baht. She enthusiastically served everyone rice. Why? Because she wanted to make sure they were all pleased and probably feeling in debt. Her hidden agenda was to make sure the resort’s name makes it to the big cake piece in the market. What power do 1 and 2 hold? The power of gatekeepers. 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Peacemaking Talk

Yesterday was my first day of period. I went through the monthly tremendous pain before I decided to give in and took a painkiller. I took only one pill (as prescribed for 12 year-old and younger) and it went away magically, except only for 4 hours or so. I did not want to take another pill but I was experiencing such great pain. I decided to put make peace with my uterus. We talked. 

I set a  relaxing and safe atmosphere for us to talk. I turned off the light and put my hands on where my uterus should be. I told it how thankful I am for it having stayed with me throughout these 24 years. I told it that I understood that the job wasn’t easy.  I told it how much I appreciated the hard work each month it did for me. I told it how much I loved it. 

I imagined the words were really soothing for my uterus because it stopped aching. I usually have the stomach pain for the first two days but my period. But after the talk, my uterus has been working wondrously. 

I love you, uterus